submitted by Renee B, KS

I’ve decided after thirty years of suppressing my feelings of shame, guilt and being afraid,  that it was time to break the silence of my abuse. I am sharing my story as a healing process for myself, but to give other survivors a hope for recovery.

If I had a chance to go back in time and redo any part of my life, would I?  Or If I only knew back then what I know now would I change any part of my past?  My answer would be no.  Although I would never willingly put myself through the pain and trials again, I wouldn’t change the outcome.  If I wouldn’t have gone through these times, I would have never become the stronger person I am today.  My wounds have healed, but the scars remain as a simple reminder that something good can emerge from painful situations.

I could never have envisioned that my life would be forever changed by various experiences . At the age of nine my parents divorced. A girlfriend of mine, thinking she was being comforting, molested me. This happened on several occasions and deep inside I knew it was wrong. I did not understand the complexity of the issue, so it was easier to stop being friends with her. If we were not friends, than it would stop and go away. I was confused and ashamed, so I told nobody. I wanted to forget, so I buried those feelings deep inside. At this point, I was forced to grow up at the age of nine. Read more »